Marriage Preparation Course Session 2: Commitment

Earlier, we had a discussion on commitment. It is part of the Marriage Preparation Course that Oli and I had to take prior to making that big leap of faith called 'Marriage'.

Why do we do this course? Well, being Christian, it is recommended. Getting marry is a big thing. It's a union between two people. It's a new phase to embark on. And as common as it is, it is also totally an unfamiliar phase, especially for newly wed. As mentioned in the video, people take diving courses in order to dive or driving lessons in order to drive, then why not take courses to prepare us for marriage. Nowadays, it is so common for marriage to breakdown and end in a bitter divorce and this is attributed by many things such as infidelities, irreconcilable differences etc. So it is important for Oli and I to take this course to prepare us and also help us develop a strong foundation for a lasting marriage.

We did Session 1, which was on Communication. In brief, it's about communicating effectively considering factors that might affect the way we communicate i.e.our personalities, our family background and our circumstances and also taking into account possible barriers to effective communication.

For Session 2 on Commitment, we discussed about why Marriage. Whether it is for friendship or to build a family life, marriage is a covenant and not a contract, As opposed to contract which bonds two parties with signatories to agree on terms and conditions, covenant marriage is bond on a promise to each other, a promise to God to love and be committed to each other for as long as both shall live. It is for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health. It is unconditional. We also discussed about how important it is to plan time together on a daily,weekly and annual basis and also to set some time apart doing or pursuing our own interest.

It's funny how even before Oliver and I got together 7 years ago, as friends, we actually discussed about love and commitment and we both agreed that love is not all that. In reality, yes, two people fall in love and get into relationship. But overtime, the love they once had may not be the same. Couples do fall out of love. They get irritated with one another. They'll hate each other's gut. They may even start to wonder, 'Why did I marry him./her in the first place?" This thing happens. That's when commitment comes into the picture. Recall 'For better, for worse.' What ties a married couple long after the initial 'love' is gone is commitment. When two people are committed in their marriage, they'll make effort to do whatever it takes. Even to rekindle their love and it is possible.

It's all about commitment and the rest will follow.

Good Morning!

It' s a Saturday morning and exactly one week since Oli left to Germany. I am rested in the new apartment. Watched a video of the Marriage Preparation Course Session 2: Commitment.  Oliver and I will be having a discussion over it later this evening my time. So, I'm looking forward to it. Discussion is good. :)

I am now enjoying my cuppa coffee with my current favourite coffee biscuit to go namely 'Lotus'. It's only available in Germany and probably, Belgium. I love it!

So here's me enjoying my morning break.

Pardon the webcam poor resolution. Well, I got to get ready to head out. Going to scout location for our garden wedding ceremony + reception.

Hopefully, it will be a productive scouting. Ta.

Lucky I'm In Love With My Best Friend

There were so many moments to cherish from our engagement day. From seeing families and friends come together, the formalities that took place to the amusement of friends who were not accustomed to Kadazan's tradition when it comes to engagement, revelling and thanking God for the beautiful weather throughout, having been blessed not once, but twice by a Cathecist and Reverends respectively among other blessings by family and friends. When I planned for the engagement (and yes, Oli let me planned the whole thing and he was there to help whenever needed), what I had in my must-have-during-eday list were cupcakes, balloons, candles, pictures of us hung around, good food and good company. And we had all that. I also wanted a fun photobooth where our guests can take fun pictures with us and just have fun with it. This part was challenging because we had the party at the pool side area and due to time constraint, it would be time, money and energy consuming to create a physical photobooth. So, a friend suggested why not just get a writing board where guests could write their messages to us and take pictures with it. I thought, it was a good idea, simple and practical. So we did just that. Anyway back to moments. I guess nothing beats to just look at the person you love and to feel blessed, lucky and excited to just embark on another journey as best friends and of course as fiance and fiancee. Still getting used to those terms.Pictures ahead. Enjoy.



Candid facial expressions



And here he comes



Jon doing what he does best

 

Feeding cake to each other is just not our thing hence the awkwardness



Decorating the room by hanging polaroid pictures of us. Thanks Jeremy and Samentha!

 

Alice who flew all the way from Sandakan just to be there. How awesome!

 

I find this funny. What's with Jon's facial expression? So uncle...!



Beautiful couple



I love the fact that he's good with kids.



Guests & messages



Those who travelled miles to celebrate the special day with us. Thank you!



The girls and a baby

 

The family of two



Love is patient, Love is kind

Indeed! 'Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy it came from divine, this is Love.'- Jon Tse's song on 'Love' from his new album 'I'm Alive'

Oliver is back in Germany and I'm still here and we're engaged!. Great news for our families, our friends and us. We're excited to be engaged and uber excited to plan for the wedding in August 2011. One year from now. Having sense how time flies these days, it's just a matter of time and there're so many things to discuss, plan and do and it is extra challenging for us to plan it separately. But we pray that all things will fall into places. Pray for us too people.

Let's talk about how the engagement went. Well overall, it went pretty smoothly despite some minor rush here and there and me being the panicky fiance to be then. We had it on August 14th and the engagement took place in two parts; the formalities done according to the Kadazan Dusun tradition was done in the afternoon. Basically, it's a discussion between two families with the village headman and a mediator to agree on dowries and gifts e.g. bufallo and pig. These I kid not! And the second part was done at the family's new apartment to celebrate it with close friends. We had a buffet lay out and food catered from 'The Hut',always the family's choice of caterer, and had it by the pool side area.

But you know what, I think I'll save more details in the next post because it's kinda late here. I'm typing this at 1 am in the morning but I needed to write something. Haha.

For now, this will do.

Love,

Mel.

Oh Happy Day

August 14th, 2010. A day to remember.

We're getting engaged today!!! As I'm typing this down, I am still in my black tank top and stripey skirt but with hair and make up all done. I went out to the living room  earlier and aunties and cousins were exclaiming, 'Is that what you are going to wear???' Why of course not. But then again, what's wrong with with wearing this. It's cool~~~!!!

Oliver smsed earlier. He was having Dimsum with the rest of his family asking whether he should wear a tie. That boy.

Cakes and cupcakes are here. It looks beautiful. Thankful that mum finally persuaded me to have a cake which initially was not in the plan.

I can hear conversations, laughters, cries, sniffles and snuffles taking place around me.

So yes, today is a Happy Day. Thank you Lord!

Engagement Shoot Sneak Peek

Over the weekend, we had our engagement shoot. During the span of 2 days, our venue shooting consist of Garden Cafe @ Curve, Oliver's aunt attic, bits of Putrajaya and Sekinchan in Kuala Selangor. Quite a variety. Our concept was quite challenging given the weather and trying to find the perfect spots especially for one particular concept we had i.e. picnic concept, but we must say we had so much fun and so far, the pictures look great prior post editting. So here's a sneak preview of our 'picnic' concept shoot.

Picture credit to Cedric and Adrian from http://www.shepherdpictures.com/

I can't wait to see the rest of the pictures!